What If You Have Nothing to Say?

Go back to the Xanga years. Remember those? Yeah, that was my first attempt at blogging. My first account was named aURiCle_HolOcAUsT. Awful. I was sporadic in my posting, and usually felt like I needed to say a lot; or at least be really deep and thought provoking. When in Detroit, I attempted a rebirth of cool and started a new Xanga account; which was my first A Boy Brushed Red… blog—to no avail. I have revisited those accounts back in 2010, which are still active, and updated the profile pics; but it just feels like a wasteland there.

I flirted with Blogger, but didn’t care for it (which meant no blogging). Then, I relaunched a blogger site when I began reviewing books, and it became solely a book review page; which is also titled A Boy Brushed Red… This is for my Booksneeze reviews.

Finally, the world of the WordPress was opened to me. This was started a bit before the relaunch of the Blogger site. I love WordPress. But, even with my love for the site, it was more of an occasional affair due to my lack of blogging. This site launched in June of 2010, and I posted 20 times the rest of the year. Then, in 2011, I more than doubled that for the year! (Impressive, right? … not.) But, in mid-November of last year I had a revelation, and my desire to blog has drastically changed. Apart from my January Social Media Fast, I have been blogging about 4-5 times a week. This has been challenging at times, because I don’t want to say something just for the sake of saying something, yet I really want to be writing every day.

But, what if you have nothing to say? This question used to run through my mind a lot. And then later along the line it hit me: I should always be able to say something. No, not for the sake of just saying something, but because I should be putting into my life the Word of God, spending time in prayer, and imparting truth into others’ lives. If I am actively doing this daily, then there should be ideas, thoughts, questions, Scriptures, and observations that can be shared with you. No, I won’t share everything I am thinking or experiencing. That would just be weird.

So, why the long intro reminiscing on the ancient and failed blogging attempts? Because they demonstrate what my life was like, and my lack of discipline and desire to share what God is doing in my life. It is somewhat reflective of the kind of relationship I had with Him. I was treating Him more like an unstable, uncertain dating relationship rather than the devoted, faithful marriage that it should represent. There was a lot of growing that needed to take place in my life… maturity was a must, and it took some time to get there. Thankfully, God is faithful and He has grace that extends far beyond what I can comprehend. He allowed me the opportunity to be mentored by some great men, and used these times to break me and reshape me; and that has instilled in me a devotion to the Lord on a level that I didn’t have before. For that alone, I am forever grateful. Not that I can now blog about it, but because my life, family, and ministry are forever changed.




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